I have to say, with all the stress in my life right now, I still feel the happiest I have ever felt. Why? Because on October 1, 2011, I got married! Yes, married. We thought initially about putting it off until 2012, but he wants to join the army by Christmas..I am not planning a wedding on the military's schedule..they change too much for me to plan something that big around! I do have to say, having an uncle that is a Roman Catholic priest makes that special day even better when he does your wedding mass! It was truly an amazing day!!
From what people have said, the reception was great..I honestly don't remember most of it..that day was so crazy! As long as everyone enjoyed themselves, and I am married..all is good :)
We took the honeymoon in TN at a family friend's second home in the mountains..it was beautiful! No morning temp was above 40 degrees, and the days never got above 72 degrees. Being a FL girl born & raised, this was a shock!! I did okay with all the differences, until the last day of our trip..i managed to slip and fall down stairs I didn't notice they were wet. So..fresh back from the honeymoon, and trying to get back into swing of things at school, and I am physically stopped because I fell..my poor professors must think I am a terrible student.. oy. Lol!
This next month should be highly interesting!! :) <3
Monday, October 10, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Blowing up or Blowing off steam
There is a fine line for me between losing my cool and yelling at someone and walking away and going to do something more constructive. So is the case sometimes when dealing with family. With family (even very close friend's family), all bets are off and the rule book is set sailing through the window.
Today was just a very trying day. In attempting to regain the faith I had as a kid, I find there are days I am totally at my wits end grasping at straws praying for the inner peace to keep my bearing. I had a final that was just exhausting to me. I wasn't as prepared as I would have wanted to be, and for whatever reason...I got the test in front of me and I had a panic attack. Full on chest locking up, can't breathe, pain in my side, panic attack. Lasted the first fifteen minutes of the exam, and didn't help alleviate any stress that's for sure. I made it through. I hope.
I got home to see Mike and I get to hear his argument with his mother over gas money. $60 yesterday is supposed to make it to Tallahassee and back to Jacksonville with three days of class and HaganaH. Did I mention Mike drives a truck? What do gas prices look like? Oh right, not a freaking chance $60 will cover much.
I really don't like to rant and feel this emotional and angry, but sometimes it just comes up when I feel my hands are tied and I can't/shouldn't say anything because it's not my place. I just wish Mike had the ability to stand up for himself and stop getting walked on. One of my pet peeves is watching people close to me have to just suck it up, and I am usually liable to say something and defend them.
I really just can't wait to be back in Jacksonville this weekend. This time it will be for good. Thank God. I need the break and to be back home with friends and family. It may sound stupid, but I need that ability to have other places to go. More friends to visit, more to do, hopefully a job to go to, streets I know, places to 'hide out' when I need to cool off, etc.
3 More days...
Today was just a very trying day. In attempting to regain the faith I had as a kid, I find there are days I am totally at my wits end grasping at straws praying for the inner peace to keep my bearing. I had a final that was just exhausting to me. I wasn't as prepared as I would have wanted to be, and for whatever reason...I got the test in front of me and I had a panic attack. Full on chest locking up, can't breathe, pain in my side, panic attack. Lasted the first fifteen minutes of the exam, and didn't help alleviate any stress that's for sure. I made it through. I hope.
I got home to see Mike and I get to hear his argument with his mother over gas money. $60 yesterday is supposed to make it to Tallahassee and back to Jacksonville with three days of class and HaganaH. Did I mention Mike drives a truck? What do gas prices look like? Oh right, not a freaking chance $60 will cover much.
I really don't like to rant and feel this emotional and angry, but sometimes it just comes up when I feel my hands are tied and I can't/shouldn't say anything because it's not my place. I just wish Mike had the ability to stand up for himself and stop getting walked on. One of my pet peeves is watching people close to me have to just suck it up, and I am usually liable to say something and defend them.
I really just can't wait to be back in Jacksonville this weekend. This time it will be for good. Thank God. I need the break and to be back home with friends and family. It may sound stupid, but I need that ability to have other places to go. More friends to visit, more to do, hopefully a job to go to, streets I know, places to 'hide out' when I need to cool off, etc.
3 More days...
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